Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Little Green Bag (Random Table, Any System)

Little Green Bag (I)
You find a little green bag. In it there might be...
  1. (3d4) severed human hands. All of them extremely well-preserved, pliant and slightly warm to the touch. They have all but healed at the point where they were removed from their original bodies. One of the hands is wearing a milky jade ring carved into the likeness of three vigorously entwined serpents.
  2. A partridge mounted on a deftly trimmed section of a branch lovingly cut from a pear tree. There are (1d4) pears dangling from the section of branch. Each of them cure 3d4 damage if eaten within an hour of being plucked from the branch. When the last pear is removed, the taxidermied bird emits a faint squawk of indignation and flies off stiffly.
  3. Six used scalpels (as knives: very short reach, -1 to hit, X2 damage), a crumpled and blood-soaked map of some large metropolitan area with (2d6) spots marked-out with a black grease pencil, and someone's kidney wrapped-up in a cheap silk scarf.
  4. Eighteen pounds of dead, dried-out cockroaches.
  5. (3d4) assorted batteries of various types. Some of them are leaking various caustic substances.
  6. A cracked faux-malachite bowling ball encrusted with something Squick and/or Ickorous.
  7. A Gronk sword that won't fit back into the bag once it is removed.
  8. A really, really angry squirrel.
  9. Eight yellowed and curiously stained 3"x4" index cards detailing Eight Magical Weapons, alas there is no information provided as to where these items might be found.
  10. Five cans of off-brand 10w30 motor oil.
  11. All the raw components necessary for a Jaladari to craft a few dozen minor wards or charms. There might be a reward for the return of this stuff...if you can find the right charm-peddler.
  12. The journal of Aloysius Hemlock. Each entry is written backwards in a recursive magical-cypher requiring it to be read in a mirror in moonlight. There may be (1d4) odd, reversed variant spells interspersed through the text as well as a few vague references that sound quite portentous but lack all context. At the moment.
  13. A well-carved bit of blue-green ivory that is half-way to becoming a very elegant wand. Too bad whomever was working on it was interrupted. There's a base 30% chance that there are some well-used carving tools in the bag as well.
  14. A sleeping squid sealed within a large, heavy glass jar. Now that you've woken it up, it stares expectantly at you.
  15. (2d4) Bruthem toe-nails.
  16. Buried beneath hundreds of small teeth is a hand-written Gothic manuscript of decidedly grotesque character. It gives off the scent of patchouli and storax. There are cat teeth mixed in with the rest, but this isn't noticeable until after the manuscript has been removed.
  17. Four dozen tiny blue ferns, each one with its roots individually wrapped tightly in a burlap ball that has been treated with a solution of some sort that preserves them until they are removed, after which they begin to rot if not planted or potted in 1d6 hours.
  18. (6d6) exotic tulip bulbs.
  19. This bag is empty, however it also suffers from having been imprinted with a form of the Triple Shadow spell, making it slightly conspicuous, depending on the company you keep.
  20. Sixty-three tin whistles and one kazoo. All of them covered in spit and reeking of cheap beer.
  21. A crudely-drawn diagram sketched-out on a tattered piece of badly-frayed sail-cloth showing the proper way to butcher a Giant Albino Penguin.
  22. Four hundred glass marbles in six different sizes, all of exceptional quality.
  23. Several disparate pieces of silverware and three napkin-rings of carved soapstone that may or may not be blasphemous but are certainly obscene.
  24. Three bundles of unused postcards depicting a variety of clowns from Little Carcosa and a dog-eared copy of The Mundy Guide to the City: A Comprehensive Guide to the Five Baronies of the Metropolis. Too bad the majority of the pages are stuck together by blood and some tarry substance that may still be moving if you look closely enough at it for long enough. Someone has sketched out a rough map on the inside of a book of matches that purportedly shows the way to a derelict barber shop. The matches have been ruined by exposure to the black stuff.
  25. A small actinic torch sans batteries and a pair of Doctor Bronson's patented Wermpliers.
  26. (1d4) random non-powered hand-tools.
  27. The complete rigging of a schooner, including every line, rope or piece of sail, all expertly rolled-up, tightly folded, and packed neatly into the bag in such a way that simply boggles the mind.
  28. Two gallons of wort from a long-lost brewery sloshing about in a pair of matching hermetically-sealed containers. To someone with a good knowledge of Zymurgy, this stuff is worth its weight in gold, or better.
  29. Six pounds of raw Cacao, a dozen seed-pods and (1d4) pounds of 'cocoa powder.'
  30. A nicely sculpted figurine cast in black bronze of a Grobbly-Bonk that can either be used to summon, bind or ward-off one of the nasty things depending upon how well you know your Aklo...
You might also find some use for the Questionable Trinkets & Trash Tables or some of our other Alternative Treasure tables.

And then there is Porky's excellent 100 Items Lost or Found on the Rogue Spacer table, which we highly recommend.


  1. GVery cool stuff. Every eclectic! And thanks for the plug for the City.

    1. Thanks Trey. We're getting a bunch of tables done, so we cna clear some room in the wueue for all the back-log of Wermspittle stuff we've been working on...and quite a few other things...

  2. I'll echo Trey, with the thanks for the nod too. It's an energising mix too, and I like the idea of taking a more specific concept as the head for a table.

    1. We like Random Tables that you just want to find a way to use them in a game. Making them a bit more specific seems to make the table more useful and a lot more fun to write-up.


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